December 14, 2020
Episode 89

Why Good Sex Matters with Neuroscientist Dr. Nan Wise

Sex is the elephant in the room that most people can’t stop thinking about but also which most of us have no good language to discuss. We hide it, or we flaunt it, and far too many learn from porn, which is so rarely a good teacher about good sex.

We owe it to ourselves to be better. We deserve the ability to talk about sex without hiding from it, to have clear and honest discussions of what we want—assuming those conversations are with partners who also want to have these discussions and not just women you happen to see on the internet—and find shameless ways to realize those desires.

Our guest this week is Dr. Nan Wise. Nan is a neuroscientist and sex therapist, and author of the book “Why Good Sex Matters.” It’s such an important discussion, but be aware that it does contain frank conversation about sex and sexual trauma, and listeners should use their own discretion. Additionally, this episode focuses on sex and sexual pleasure and as such does not specifically discuss asexuality. We see, support and acknowledge our Ace listeners. To learn more about Asexuality, visit the Trevor Project.

Listen:

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Sources for audio clips

How to Have Safe Sex during the Pandemic - The Doctors https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QLnKDnxA7Lc
#146 Why Good Sex Matters - With Neuroscientist Dr. Nan Wise - Pure Pleasure Shop https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n5a4rMTEVdI
The Practical MD: Can I have sex during COVID-19? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZSvdW-WdnxU
The Declining American Libido - Independent Man https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BTJeURcz0mc
Epicurus | The Philosophy of Pleasure - Einzelgänger https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIETGDgMdtg
People having less sex
The Declining American Libido - Independent Man https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BTJeURcz0mc
Innate sexual desire
Your Brain Wants You To Have Sex. Here's How That Works. | Better | NBC News https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4DJ0F-UFF4g
Science of Orgasm
Science of Orgasms - asapSCIENCE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpc2NjUAtOY
Pleasure seeking
Epicurus | The Philosophy of Pleasure - Einzelgänger https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIETGDgMdtg
Talking to kids about sex
How To Talk To Your Kids About Sex - Kenneth Adams, PhD: Kids in the House https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ncAZs65newY
Labiaplasty/Genital Cosmetic Surgery
Gurl 101 – 8 Lies Porn Tells You About Sex - GURL.com https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FICQvrccT2k
Reduced Libido
Low Sexual Desire Psychological Aspects – Mayo Clinic Women’s Health Clinic https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3UKT1keq1Sk
Outro
A psychologist explains how important sex is in a relationship - Business Insider https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CtAQgqR3OLw

Show Credits

Host: Alyssa Milano
Executive Producer: Alyssa Milano
Associate Producer: Ben Jackson
Editing and Sound Production: Natasha Jacobs
Music by: Josh Cooke & Eleisha Eagle